"A Silent Weekend"

I feel like it’s time to celebrate!

I won’t have any kids this weekend! Hooray! Hooray! It’s a miracle!

Seriously, I’m taking my 4 year old to his daddy’s for the weekend. So, my husband and I will be at home with no kids. We’ll probably just sit and stare at the TV all weekend.

It’s kind of like we don’t have anything to talk about when the kids aren’t around. He doesn’t talk much anyway. What’s going to happen when the kids all grow up and move out? Is that what happens? Couples get divorced b/c they don’t have anything to talk about?

Of course, I don’t see that happening with us, but I can understand why it happens with other people.

My husband and I kind of have an understanding. When we met, he told me that he doesn’t talk much. So, I knew I was destined for a life of talking to myself.

For a while, I thought I could change him. I tried to make him hold conversations. But ultimately, he won. He really doesn’t like to talk.

I’m ok with that now. My family has even come to be ok with it.

Now I’m left with the thought of “what will I do this weekend?”. I know one thing I’ll do. Saturday night, some of the girls from RedRiverMoms.com and I are going to get together. I’m going to be teaching them the ins and outs of selling stuff on EBay.

It’s a good way for me to meet other moms and help other people at the same time. If any of you ladies want to come, shoot me and email at melswanson@gannett.com.

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"Am I Doing The Right Thing?"

All of this chaos has got me thinking, “Am I doing the right thing?”

I feel that I did the right thing in allowing my son to entertain the thought of living with his father.

I feel that I did the wrong thing in allowing the boys to be split up.

The thing is I can’t have it both ways.

So, what is the right thing to do? Is it to fight to get my son back and make this already delicate situation even worse? Is it to keep them split up?

For me, letting both of them go live with their father is absolutely not an option! The 4 year old doesn’t want to live with him, and I don’t think that he needs to be away from his mother. Plus, my 4 year old is REALLY close to his step-father. He’s pretty much raised him since he was 1-1/2. He adores this little boy.

The relationship between my 7 year old and his step-father isn’t that close. They get along and my husband loves him and visa versa, but they met when he was 4. So, he was already close to his real father. My 7 year old is the one that has really taken the divorce hard.

I guess the good thing is that it was a very peaceful divorce. It’s only now that it’s getting volatile.

I say that it’s volatile, but it’s mainly because I cannot accept him leaving. So, I’ve become a difficult ex-wife. I told my ex that it’s not personal. It’s because he’s come between me and our children. I cannot sit back and watch this all unfold without saying anything.

I think he understands, but he certainly doesn’t like it.

All in all, I think he’s a great person. I just think that he’s not making the best parenting decisions. I feel like he’s letting his emotional needs cloud his best judgement.

Could I be wrong? I’d like to hear both sides of the story from people out there.

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